Thanks for nothing.

Exactly one year ago, I got up, took the bus and went to meet my online best friend, who broke my heart a few months later. Today, a year later, I’m in the same city, and he’s gone.. forever. Strange how things can change for that time. I would lie if I say I don’t miss him, but not the bastard he turned out to be. I miss the person I met on 21 July 2009 and who I spent the 3 greatest days of my summer with. I’m surprised I even remember the date. No, wait, I’m not, I always remember melodramatic sentimental shit like that. I know I shouldn’t because I’m sure he doesn’t, but here I am – I don’t know what I’ve studied in chemistry in 11th grade, but I remember stupid dates like this one. I haven’t written any scribbles since we severed all contact. Thanks for the lack of muse, too.
Speaking of dates, I, being a complete moron, forgot Sean Brennan’s birthday, which was on 17th. So a very late Happy Birthday, Sean, and I wouldn’t mind new music sometime soon.
On a brighter note, I finally got my first salary. Ah, the unique feeling to have money you’ve earned yourself, and finally to be able to get your mom a present for her birthday. Which is tomorrow, if anyone wonders. Okay, I think I’m done for today. If I ever write something new, it will be posted for sure.

………………….

Three words – I FUCKING PASSED!!!!!!! ^^ ^^ ^^

Working Girl

I got a job, by the way. For three weeks now. Didn’t really have time to write here. I enter the travel data of the buses in a travel agency. It’s not hard, just a little boring. And I can’t go without mentioning the nerve some drivers have when talking to me. I might be single, but I’m not desperate. Actually, after my ‘adventures’ in Loveland lately I don’t want to hear about relationships anytime soon. It’s just me and Nightwish now – yeah, I got into Nightwish, too, my new obsession. ^^

My exam results are out this Friday. I’m getting very, very, very nervous. So if I don’t write soon here, it means I’m crying my eyes out because I have to re-take my exams, OR I’m so excited I’ve passed I can’t remember to post it. Let’s hope it will be the last one… really.

…And we are homeward bound…

Didn’t I tell you 8 months ago that I’ll see you soon, didn’t I? Didn’t I tell you the next post will be from Bulgaria? I sure did! I’m finally home…. for almost a week now, but, hey, I have a life, I couldn’t sit and write here right away. It kinda feels like something’s still missing – I haven’t seen almost any of my friends here, most of them are having their exams now so I’ll have to wait a little. Ah, word of advice – remember not to wear gothic clothes in a small town – you’ll begin to feel like an animal in the zoo. At least this reminds you you’re home… and I’m still happy I’m here. And I have the furriest of all kittens in the world! It’s one tiny fur ball that doesn’t stop bouncing, running, playing with your feet, biting your hands and wondering which one of the other cats to poke. ^^
I haven’t written any scribbles in a while – I’m not exactly inspired right now… maybe ‘cause I’m not depressed at all. xD But I don’t put too much worry about that, it always comes on its own. Aaand since I don’t feel like writing at all right now, I’m getting out of here and going to bed. Good night! ^^

Recap

Okay, time for a longer post. I’m one exam and 6 days away from going home for summer. The former is on the 3rd and I’m catching a bus for Manchester Airport on the 4th in the morning. My flight is at 6:30am on the 5th…. unless certain volcanoes decide something else, in which case there are gonna be consequences! This is my last week as a fresher – I never really thought about that till a few days ago. I just hope I’ll pass my exams and won’t have to come back in August to re-take them. Then I can have 4 whole months at home – I’ll probably work somewhere, but I’ll still be home. So I decided to take a recap of the past 8 months. Going to university in another country gave me a lot and took a lot. I had to learn to live without my parents and take care of things they usually take care of. I endured the worst day of my life which, unincidentally, was also my first day in England. I met a lot of new people, got some new and good friends, put and end of two old friendships that I’m probably gonna miss a lot. I got very noisy and messy flatmates I had a few good times with. I found love in the wrongest of wrong places, got blown off, and still don’t care about that – someday someone will come without me searching desperately and he will care. Moving on – on a brighter note, my CD collection increased immensely, as well as all the weird gothic stuff I love so much. ^^ I got an insight into psychology and politics, and hopefully, I’ll get a deeper insight next year. I got a freaking facebook – and all the people who wanted me to get it now barely log in! As for the things I didn’t get – a goth looking vegetarian straight edge boyfriend, a sports centre card, swimming in the sports centre pool, rock climbing, horse riding, getting confidence to talk in seminars, eat marshmallows around a camp fire…. well, let’s hope I’ll do these things in my second year. I finally got my income bursary and paid my deposit for the house for next year – so now I officially have a house, and a room just for myself and this time I’m gonna live with people I like. I already packed most of my stuff, those I’m gonna leave here – some of my friends are staying here so they’re gonna take it in their house for the summer. I can’t believe I’ve brought (and bought) so many stuff…. they all fit in exactly 3 suitcases….. Girls will be girls, unfortunately. OH, I almost forgot! I found that people here actually CARE about vegetarians and got introduced to the wonderful quorn food I’m gonna miss at home…. again, I hope I’ll stay in Bulgaria for the whole summer. The exams weren’t that hard, but I’m still not sure if they’re gonna like what I’ve written or if I hadn’t made a mistake in some of the calculations…. Anyway, I won’t know until June 15th, so I can have 2 weeks for myself.
This post is beginning to get a bit large, and I think it’s time to finish it. The next one will probably come from Bulgaria…. again, if some volcano doesn’t decide something else!

Happy Dirtday!

Aaand before this day goes ruthlessly in history, I’d like to wish a Happy Dirtday to Hunter from AFI! I almost wrote this post on the 5th, because I thought it’s then…. you can’t remember everything after all. So – all the best to Hunter and the band, I love you all, thank you for making me a better person! ^^

Can you paint your pain?

I finally did a bit of volunteering today. I joined the volunteers group in the university before Easter and today 5 of us went to paint an old lady’s apartment. I got the kitchen and the color blue… which is better than my friends who got the bathroom…. and pink. I still have paint over my nails. Fortunately, my clothes got away with the paint, but my jeans got a little bloody. Which brings me to my next story. I started jogging last week with a friend of mine around the neighbourhood, and on Wednesday we were just starting to run and the next thing I know, I was on the ground, face down, with my training suit torn at the knee, my palms and knees peeled and bloody. I don’t know if I tripped or lost my balance. Thank goodness I didn’t break anything. My palms have almost healed, and as for the knees – one of them is in all colors of the rainbow, and the other doesn’t seem to even want to start healing. Its wound’s bigger and I can’t bend my leg properly, or stretch it properly for that matter. So today when I had to crouch to paint to lower part of the wall the wound opened and started to bleed. Buuut it will be alright. It’s gonna leave me a nice scar, but it’s gonna be alright…. like I don’t have enough scars all over my legs. Every school I’ve studied in has left its mark on me legs. 8th I was chasing a tennis ball or something and ran into one of the big stone flower pots in front of my high school. My leg’s still a little concave where it met the pot. One year later, I fell down the stairs, sat on my left leg and sledged like that a few stairs down. My leg’s still a little black and blue. And now I’ll remember my first year in university with a new mark on my knee. I’m seriously considering giving up jogging. At least for a while. Despite that… I’m okay. A little bit more bipolar than usual, but hey, who isn’t? And today made me feel good about myself… which doesn’t happen very often. It really warms your black little heart when you help someone with something they can’t do themselves. Alright, enough talking, gotta wash the paint off my nails.